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She was Once
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taboo subject
Written at 6:07 PM on Monday, May 5, 2008 0 comment(s)

Forgive the pun but this topic has been done to death. How often do you find yourself wondering how would it all end for you? When would that moment be? Would this step I take be the reason for my demise?

At times I refuse to believe in fate but sometimes you just tell yourself to accept it as something destined.

In a way, those who have lost loved ones feel more consoled when they think of it this way. I always say that religion is a form of confidence, a variant of hope.

Don't mind the exam-time-Buddhist here, but those are my thoughts. By telling yourselves that after a person is gone, that there is an after world waiting for him or her, it is a comforting thought to entertain. Though it may be cliche to say but by knowing that the deceased is in a "better place", you somehow feel that whatever the reason he or she died off doesn't matter any more.

No matter what, it's still hard to fathom death at our age. It's something that happens to other people but it doesn't happen to you. It happens to people who have lived for years far beyond our own. It's time for them to make way for the young. Turns out, death doesn't quite work that way.

People like you and me are dying of cancers, they are dying of car accidents, they are getting raped and murdered.

It is because of how unpredictable death is that really boggles the mind.Would you rather know if you're going to die or would you want it to happen in an instant and not have the chance to say goodbye?The worst part about a funeral is that there would be so many people saying such nice things about the person who will never ever have the chance to hear it.

What's the point? If I'm to be praised, i would very much like to be around to hear it.

Ala Tuesdays With Morrie, if I knew that I was going to die, I would like to have a living funeral as well. I would like to be there to laugh with my family and friends. I would like to be there to remember the good times we had together.

Everyone would have a chance to make their peace with me. I'd forgive friends whom have fallen out with me, I'd try to improve my relationships with a whole lot of people.I know it's easy to say this now in a time when I'm in the pink of health.

Regret and remorse only hit when one's time is coming to an end. So why can't I use each and everyday that I now have to right the wrongs in my life, right? I think it's called procrastinating.

I only work well under pressure. Do you think it's easier to die than losing someone you love? Imagine losing your parent to some terminal illness, or worse, a child of your own. Just the very thought of dealing with such news makes me sick to the very core.

Thus, I believe that dying is easier to do than losing someone you love. Is that considered selfish? My impending death would probably hurt the people around me. Is it better to die or to hurt?Whenever you hear about someone's death, a strange, awkward and haunting pause will follow.

The deceased person's world is now silent and blank. Nothing exists anymore for them.

Strange how death is right? It's just the off button to a human life but yet it deeply affects the people around them.

A morbid thought but a thought none the less: Have you ever thought about how it will end for you?


xoxo,

Su-Quinn