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She was Once
%1 %2 %4 %5
4 more hours till class
Written at 11:28 PM on Thursday, June 12, 2008 0 comment(s)

i know i know...i should be sleeping right...most of my friends are sleeping right now...either because they are not feeling well or simply because they're simply tired...

went to amnesty this afternoon and surprisingly,none of us camwhored and someone just slept the whole way through in the car...haha!anyways,learnt more about what amnesty is really all about and would be introducing that during the Law Awareness Week...do come and visit us at our booth k?as i have had said earlier,i'm always surrounded by pretty girls....so those people who are taking care of the booth alongside me will also be pretty girls...but the guys...just don't know what to say bout them...

today is the last day for the submission of the photography competition and what have i done??nothing...been procastinating a lot...gonna go snap photos later though...because i missed the first round....



it's in the past
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

whatever had happened,had already happened...it would never be the way it was...whatever happened had happened for a reason...i've already learned my lesson and i don't want it to be the way it was before because for all that you've done to me,how do you expect me to forgive u??if i do what do u think my friend would think of me?so forget whatever that happened just put it all in the past k?just let whatever happened be a lesson for both of us...just don do the same thing to any other person who loves you...just take care of yourself k?



quote of the day
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

I would rather be hated for who i am than loved for who i am not.



random photos
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

random photos of me and my dears...



what is it like being young?
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

i'm not crapping....so,hear me out k?

So what it is really like being young. Seriously, do society really understand the thick and thins we young people have to go through every single day? Yes, society was once young like us but time has changed tremendously and this generation ain't the same from the last!

How many times we hear our parents or our grandparents saying how different our generation are compared to theirs. I bet most of us get the "You're so fortunate" phrase time after time. Hey, don't get me wrong. I am truly blessed and I appreciate what my parents have to go through to raise me up to the person I've become.

What I am really saying is, we ourselves have our own battle to fight, our our challenges to face. Allow me to stress the title of this entry again. Today, we are constantly being the target of society. Yes, you can say everybody wants us badly.

Education has become the top priority on our list. It is breathed, it is lived. Whether you're a young man or women (although women are beating us man to it), you have to get the best when it comes to education. Society needs us to be well-educated or can I safely say, highly-educated, or else the future becomes gloomy. Which leads me to my next point.

Society needs us because we are the leaders of tomorrow. If is not the leaders of tomorrow, then the workers of tomorrow. New blood, new faces, new ideas. Oh yes, we are constantly needed when it comes to man-power. We are cheaper because we have least experience. Companies loves us when we apply for internships because hey, the experiences we get are much more valueble than monetary funds (bull?). And even after you get your experience, you are still deemed fresh or green!

And if you haven't notice already (because you're mindlessly manufacturing yourself for tomorrow), the product and services sector are violently competing to push their "goods" straight into our faces because we represent the majority of the market and (this is going to be hillarious) because we have stronger purchasing power (from our intership salary)! Just look at all those ads, hear those ads, taste those ads, smell those ads, feel those ads...Get my point? The campaigns are so vigorous that it engages all your five senses. Wait a minute, make it six! We are now suppose to "feel the vibe" when it comes to ads!

So yes, everybody wants us. Kinda dissapointing and sad to know we are wanted for other people's motives and purposes. I mean, who really wants us for who we are? Then again...who are we? Seriously, who are we?



bundle exchange
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

finally done with my bundle and mooting will only be a month from today....but,even so,my courseworks are still piling up...

Contract-16 July 2008
General Principle of Malaysian Law-22 July 2008
Mooting-24 July 2008
Constitutional Law-25 July 2008

English Legal System's assignment would only be due next semester....so let's put that aside and start on my contract assignment on Frustration contract which is really frustrating....

Yesterday was a night for "Just One Night"...an event held by my club and it's finally over..thank God...but next weekend would be the Secondary School's swimming competition and the week after would be Law Awareness Week...anyways,i'm proud to say,i'm done with two events and done with my bundle...

just a few more weeks till my long long LONNNGGGGGGGGGG holiday...yippeeeeee!!!!!

i'll be going to get the scuba diving licence this July...can't wait for it....but I know,I'll be damn tired....



just because
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

if u wanna talk bad bout someone,just say it to their face and stop hitting around the bush.....else,just SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!



lonely Wednesdays...
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

my roomie,Melissa left me ALONE ......AGAIN to be with her parents....it's kinda weird how we've only been together for just a few months and how close we got....she's a cute girl and kinda pretty too...somehow,my life had always been filled with pretty girls....anyways,this is the best photo of her i could find....just too many of her photos to choose from....

anyways,i am so proud of her for being so strong and brave and for fighting her emotions...she's scared and at times,she feels lonely without her family and closest friends beside her....

but i want you to know that i'll always be there for you,through thick and thin,just gimme a holler and know that,i'll be right over...I'll be your shoulder to cry on....and even if you feel you're alone,i just need you to know that you're not....and that i'm proud of you for being so strong....

i know it's hard to have so much on your mind...to think of your family and to have no close friends close to you.....

just let me know if you need anyone there at any given time or day...



to you
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

To That Special Someone….
I’m waiting here for that someone everyday and night
Needing someone to hold me tight
To cheer me up when I’m sad
And make me smile when I’m mad
I need that someone that will always care
Someone that will always be there
Even when I’m right or wrong
And always there to keep me strong
Someone to show me there is no fear
Always helping me to get me through
Someone there to say I Love You
Someone to be there when I’m cold
And always there for me to hold
Someone there for me to think of
Someone there to show me Love!!!!



Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

i'm going to start on my courseworks.....i wanted to open my microsoft word to type out my exchange bundle thingy which is due on Thursday but as the thought came to mind,my eyes began to droop....

my room mate just ate a whole lot of medicine just now...looks kinda like those bullets we used to play with with the toy gun....

anyways,going out for a walk...shall return to the coursework once i'm back...



Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

just came back from MAPCU just now...MAPCU is the event which i said i was going to swim for previously...anyways,we swam and we got second runner up which was kinda bad.....there will be another swimming event soon and we'll be swimming a relay event too...and hopefully no other event....anyways,was a tiring day....gotta go train more so that could get back to the time i used to get....



i miss Penang
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

pan mee

nasi lemak-fat ricelaksa

ju hu eng chai-cuttlefish with kangkung(a type of vegetable)

hokkien mee-hokkien noodles

Ice kacang-ice peanuts

hot plate

claypot fried kuey teow



Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

this saturday,there will be a swimming competition between colleges,and when i say colleges with a S..i mean a lot of colleges...haha!anyways,my president and my ex-president of my LIFE SAVING AND SWIMMING club eventually messaged me to ask whether would i like to be a helper for the competition this Saturday but just now at around 3,i got 3 phone calls from MR Chan from SAO asking me whether i would like to take part in the competition....adui....Saturday is the competition,now only call to ask a?think i got so much stamina meh?anyways,if i swim for the relay,we might have a good chance of winning because i'll be swimming alongside really good swimmers....but the problem is that,

  • why would i wanna swim for INTI when i can't even get scholarship when there are swimmers who could get scholardhip just by swimming for the stupid school...

  • we won't be able to get certificates if we fail in any event to get a gold,silver or bronze medal...

  • if we or any one individual get any medal,the rest of the participant for the school would get the certificate as well....why should we swim for others?

  • the certificate would be worth practically nothing and it's not like if we got it,our might-be-employer would most definitely employ us...so what the heck for do we need the certificate?

  • i'm having my time of the month AGAIN....

anyways,that's all still long to go...right now,there are other more important things on my mind....



happy birthday chu leng
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

It’s your birthday time again;
It’s true;
there’s no denying,

Another year has come and gone;
You know that I’m not lying.
So for you, the birthday person,

Here’s what I want to say:
I hope this birthday’s the best one yet,
In every delightful way.

So happy birthday to you.
Have lots of birthday fun!
May your birthday wishes all come true,
Even if you have a ton.

Just wanna wish my dear,"Happy Birthday"...

hopefully she'll have lots of fun today....anyways,too bad couldn't be there to celebrate it with her...

miss her a lot...wonder if she reads my blog?

hopefully everything is working out well for her...

anyways,here's a fake cake which i shall replace with a real one when i see her...



the devil in me...
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

i heard the phrase "we are still humans" a lot recently....

i know that as a normal human being,we would get sad and angry and if we're fortunate enough,we would feel happy once in a while....so,my question would be,if we are above all that and we are able to forgive and forget easily,are we not normal?

i've been keeping everything inside for so long....it hurts the most when you're sad and yet,you know you have to show the whole world that you're happy....how long do i still need to fake it?i wanna smile and laugh and really mean it...i know that life is filled with ups and downs and there are always people who are worst of then me....but at this very moment,i just need to sincerely smile....

i felt safe holding on to you but all doubts are on you...everything you say,i know i should doubt but i can't...because i want it more than anything to trust you and to know you've never betrayed me....i feel so insecure right now,i just need to feel a touch to let me know that there's still someone there for me...

i know i've brought you lots of trouble and i know i've been nothing but a burden....but i'm still holding on because i want to...not because i have to...i'm willing to go through all those obstacles for you but how much are you willing to give up for me?i just wished you would share everything with me instead of pushing me away....

So let me get this straight,

you were leading me on,

using me,

keeping me waiting for

something that wasn’t there,

letting me get my hopes up for you,

acting like you cared,

and allowing me to start liking you more

and more everyday

because you didn’t want to hurt me?



back in room
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

just came back from dinner and had just taken my bath...my room mate brought me a "bak chang"....on Friday,Yiling gimme two...

just came back from home and yet i miss home so much...

feeling so aggitated right now...feel like screaming my head off...anyways,courseworks are piling up so i shall begin with it soon....SOON....

bak chang = a type of chinese delicacy



teddy bear
Written at 11:28 PM on 0 comment(s)

i got another teddy bear today...woo hoo!!!!nice right?it feels so soft...and it looks cute...

anyways,spend my whole day sleeping away...feel really poor this month....phone's bill been over the top...

came back just to find the internet connection is really sucky today..kept signing in and out of msn....sorry guys....it's not my fault...our complains seems to be falling on deaf ears....

i wanted to upload the teddy bear's photo but the internet connection suck to the fullest so probably gonna upload some other time....



love me love me not
Written at 1:35 AM on Thursday, June 5, 2008 0 comment(s)

a few friends of mine had already started complaining of my blog being too emo nowadays..but i really can't help it though...i'll try to update more happy thoughts...anyways,today was a very busy day for me...i had photography club meeting which was fun as we played around with the lighting and we snapped lots of photos....after that,accompanied Abby to Christian Fellowship meeting...today,they talked bout relationship and love...i find something said today very meaningful....

in every relationship,there are the important A B C D E F and G








ACCEPT-we should accept any strength or weaknesses both parties have...

BELIEVE-there should always be trust in the relationship...

CARE-we should care for each other....

DESIRE-but save all the touching part to after marriage...

ENDURE-endure,just endure....

FORGIVE-forget and forgive all bad things in the relationship

GIVE-give ur love into the relationship...no testing out because love should be serious...

anyways,all these really do mean a lot...but somehow,it's really hard to achieve though it's actually just simple things...

and after that we prayed for each and every of our better half...

I hate to see the one I love happy with somebody but I surely hate it more to see the one I love unhappy with me...

and we had our Committee photo taking sessions and we all had to dress formally or half formal so since i was busy the whole day,i never came back to my room till around 10 i think and i look so "unique" wearing that especially at night and someone even asked me am i a staff?

anyways,that was practically what my whole day consists of...even though i planned to do some school work,i was too tired to even open my eyes....i cried so much last night and today,i look simply horrible in the photos...GOD....i hate myself for crying that easily...



to all those who have had lost someone
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

Waking up every morning,
against my will,
against my body,
trudging down a road that never ends,
used to be so much easier,
when I would wake every morning,
knowing you would be there

Within this empty shell of a life,
within this endless walk in the dark,
and with all this meaningless meandering,
all of it never seemed to matter,
I would have walked though hell,
knowing you were in my life

Now no matter how bright,
the sun chooses to shine,
the darkness simply will not lift,
except for those little moments,
those gentle,
precious moments,
when memory brings you back to me



i don't belong
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

As I walk down this road of happy faces,
I feel i dont belong?

In my mind are a thousand thoughts,
Is this loneliness?
Is this sorrow?

As I stand in the showers of rain
I wonder where my tears came from?

In my heart are a thousand wounds!

Is this loneliness?
Is this sorrow?

As i sit in this smokey room,
And drown in my sadness,
In my bottle are a thousand troubles.

Is this loneliness?
Is this sorrow?

As i lay down in my bed,
I dream of never waking again,

In my thoughts are a thousand painful memories.
This is loneliness!
This is sorrow!



from abby's blog
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

there's this girl,Abby from my link which HARDLY ever update her blog but there's this one post which i simply like....

This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day.
You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.

4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.

5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

6. You mean the world to someone.

7. You are special and unique.

8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you take another look.

11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

And always remember.... when life hands you Lemons, ask for Sugar and call me over!

Good friends are like stars.
You don't always see them, But you know they are always there.

'Whenever God Closes One Door He Always Opens Another,
Even Though Sometimes It's Hell in the Hallway'

I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here than a whole truckload when I'm gone.

Happiness keeps You Sweet,
Trials keep You Strong,
Sorrows keep You Human,
Life keeps You Humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
But Only God keeps You Going.

'Life is not in finding your limitations; Life is in finding your infinity'



what's there in life?
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

Whenever I am enjoying a cuppa alone thoughts will fill my mind therefore contemplation begins. Last week, a good friend left for United Kingdom and it will be more than a year before she comes back again. While waiting for her at a café, my focus fell on the salt and pepper shakers placed on the table and I realized something.

Salt and pepper are often use as flavorings for cooking and to make it palatable; with additional spices and ingredients added together into the dish. Somehow, it did not fail to cross my mind that our lives are like a plate of dish waiting to be cooked.

In the process of cooking, spices and flavorings are added to make the dish taste perfect; just like how we are walking the pathway of life discovering new things about ourselves along the way or certain occurrences that helped us achieve and learn from our mistakes. The achievements and mistakes that we have made and learned are added into our lives to make it concrete and furnish everything so that it will be an experience or memory that will stick in our minds for as long as we can remember.

Friends and experiences are like spices in our lives. Without them, it would not be complete and life would be too dull and the taste will be too bland. Also, emotions such as happiness, anger, sadness, love, et cetera are meant to spice up our lives. A little of everything will balance all experiences but too much of those will only cause an over-dosage.

Though it is good to add more spices but only a balance of each ingredient will make the dish taste good. There is a need to have balance in everything that we do because overdoing something is unhealthy. A wholesome dish means the usage of high quality ingredients --- our lives can be healthy as well as long as we know how to put a stop to an action for example, depression. Being too morbid will cause unhealthy situations like morbid thoughts and may lead to unwanted actions.

I do believe that variety is the spice of life and if all of us are the same, it would be boring, do you agree?



the rain help me think
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

just came back from being under the rain...somehow it felt soothing though i felt cold...and the air was blowing hard...anyways,was really glad...the rain helped me clear my head..i might have a hell of a headache tomorrow but it was still worth it...flashes of thoughts went through my head...sad and happy thoughts...

anyways,since my feet[or should i say whole body] got wet,i changed my plaster gain...so very cute la..i feel so cute...haha!

anyways,since it's getting really late,i don't wanna think bout anything anymore..i'm going to go sleep and hopefully get a flu tomorrow...haha!



teddy bear
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

got a teddy bear from someone today...just wanted to say thanks so much...i really appreciate it so much...[still got new bear smell]...hehe!

but there's another thing that i saw just now...i saw that he deleted my number from his phone d...i said that relationships are difficult to understand and somehow,we became from strangers to friend to more den friends to strangers....

just now,i almost sprain my ankle...i almost fall into the sewer outside my block...so careless of me..next time shouldn't talk on the phone and not look at the road..so shameful...luckily not much people around and i think no one saw lo...haha!even though i never sprain my ankle but the skin on my foot peeled off...don worry,won't show you guys disgusting things like that k?i wrapped it up nicely with plaster...

those who read this post is not suppose to tease me about it and not to tell anyone else bout it k?



the light at the end of the tunnel
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

i wanna find the light at the end of the tunnel,i wanna be free and go back for my semester break...when will all these go away?when will i be free from my feelings and when will i not be threatened by it anymore?



If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster.
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

Injustice can be eliminated, but human conflicts and natural limitations cannot be removed. The conflicts of social life and the limitations of nature cannot be controlled or transcended. They can, however, be endured and survived. It is possible for there to be a dance with life, a creative response to its intrinsic limits and challenges ...

hold on to life with every breath and every piece of bone in your body...

love is just a feeling..live life to the fullest and never let anything bring you down...



increase in everything
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

as everyone is blogging about it,i shall not be left out and since everyone knows that petrol prices,electricity and eveything else is going up,i shall explain no further about it...what i would like to point out is that the government are so shitty nowadays....what are they trying to do?kill us?are they trying to tell people that us being citizens voted for the wrong party?well,the opposition might be doing bad now but the increase in prices in all things are actually a global problem...

anyways,what i'm really worried about here is the fact that with all these price increase,i think that fees would be getting bigger and bigger because the value of our money would be falling...

i'm seriously worried,i'm not from a super wealthy family and i know that i'm being a burden to my family...instead of using the money for trips around the world and instead of resting at home,they're working hard to pay off my fees... to be truthful,i'm sick of being a burden and knowing that i'm a burden...

instead,i do sometimes wish that i could be the one working for my parents...i wish my mom could go for shopping everyday and i wish my dad could have a chauffeur to drive him anywhere he wants...the worst of all is that,i wish i was there caring for them instead of being in INTI wasting their money...if only the whole world is not only about certs...if only i could have an easy way out...




Because I have loved life, I shall have no sorrow to die.
Written at 1:35 AM on 0 comment(s)

Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy -- because we will always want to have something else or something more.

a lot of things happened recently and i'm feeling so stressed out...just feel like letting everything go and just wished to be free...besides clubs,events and coursework,there's something else worrying me back home...

i know i've been hot tempered nowadays and i do apologize for being bad tempered to those who care so much...i don't mean for any harm but at times,when i'm feeling down,i just wish to be alone...i'm really grateful to have people care for me even in times of trouble and not having people saying that i shouldn't find excuses...

i feel like going home to check on things but with all these burden on my shoulder,i know i shouldn't...i do miss home terribly much...