Written at 2:12 AM on Wednesday, April 29, 2009 0 comment(s)
my 500th post and i'm back in school...hmmm.....anyways, today had been a busy day...i'm tired.... had to enrol and attend classes which just lasted for a while because it's just the first day and i guess the lecturer don't really wanna give us much stress...
anyways,don't really plan on doing anything special for my 500th post because i'm really tired and i don't have any ideas on what to do....
i just wanna point out that being in love stinks...one need to compromise so much and even after you compromise, the other might not feel it....he might still feel it's not enough....what is a girl to do?i'm no superhuman....what else am i suppose to do?
we've been fighting so much recently,it's seriously feeling weird and there seems to be something blocking our relationship from getting further....is it gonna end soon?it might if i'm gonna leave here...i really wanna leave and not wanna stay back but leaving here would mean leaving lots of other things behind....it's because i've been here my whole life...
i really really really wanna pass though...arghhh..gonna have to work my ass off this semester...even if i die getting a heart attack...i still gotta work hard....
i'm through with putting hope and faith on guys...they just keep letting me down...i don't know and i totally don't understand what the heck they are thinking....i'm gonna go back to being mean..just thinking bout myself....whatever happens, just let it happen...whatever they wanna do, just let it happen...just have fun and it's all gonna be behind me...but sometimes, things that you leave behind might come back to haunt you...whatever shall happen from now on, just let it happen...i should just be thankful if it ends then too bad but i guess he should've seen it coming...stop confusing me with your mix signals....i'm confused....
it's hard being in a relationship without trust...when it's no longer there and one can't get it back...you would know that it's time to let go....sometimes, it's really haard to let go of things that you once hold dear to your heart....and loads of tears would flow and you would weep so much your eyes seems to look like they're gonna fall off...
maybe i should let it all go...even though it might hurt for now...it might be better in the future....but the one thing that stinks the most about the future is the fact that we won't know how it is gonna be...
i really wanna get an ipod touch... *sobs* humans just have too much wants and not enough money...
I'm sitting for the Company Law paper at 8 later in the day...it's gonna be my last paper for the semester then it's home sweet home for me....can't wait to go back home...i so wanna sleep for the whole two weeks and i don't wanna think bout all those stuffs that have been disturbing me....
- don't wanna think bout exams anymore knowing how I'm gonna fail....
- don't wanna think bout whether I'll be able to go to UK....
- don't wanna think bout my feelings anymore and don't wanna disturb myself with my uncontrollable feelings...
- don't wanna think bout whether all that he is saying is true or not....
just wanna go back and relax and go have fun and don't wanna bother myself anymore...i know it's problems that needs fixing otherwise i'm gonna have a hard time later on when i return....
do u feel the need to be with someone just because you feel the need to have someone there?
does it make any sense if i say that one just wanna be with another because one knows that one can't have another?
see how all my life,my world just revolves around LOVE,love,LoVe and more lOvE.....
i wish one day,i would find the one and i would be so much in love that i could leave all this behind me....
sometimes, i just don't know how you truly feels because you just act differently in front of different people....
just tell me what i need to do to have the one you which i truly know....
Written at 1:59 PM on Wednesday, April 15, 2009 0 comment(s)
I'm glad that we talked about it this morning...was feeling so moody and down the whole day and night through....anyways,sorry for always giving you so much trouble...i know..I'm so moody and totally no control over my own feelings....pathetic....but thanks for caring.... *smiles* ....had a pang of guiltiness for making you not study...all the best for your paper later on...
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. ~Eleanor Roosevelt
just finish reading a friend's blog....couldn't really do anything for her but wished she would feel better soon...known that she wanted to go for the open sea swim so much...it's just because she seems to be a little too occupied with her studies,assignments and everything else this semester...if she wants, she could have my shoulder to bite....
feeling sleepy ALL the time....this is really frustrating but once i open my books,all i wanna do is just sleep...damn this aunt of mine....hopefully she leaves before i go back home...don't wanna have to bring so much tissues back for her.....
Life is like an onion: You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep. ~Carl Sandburg
love is truly meant for idiots.....and to be able to quote it, i must be a class of them....keep falling.....and as i fall, keep doing embarrassing things...don't wanna fall again...i wanna stand up and for now,i wanna stand on my own two feet...don't wanna lean on anyone again....as i lean on someone else,realize that no one could be trusted to care for you....even though you might be less selfish than others to let me lean on you for a little while, but too bad you don't wanna bear me....
my monthly aunt is here to visit me again...and man, do i feel tired and sleepy?even though i just woke up, my whole body feels like i've just came back from war....and i just keep yawning.....i really need to focus and remember all these case with weird names....it would be great if there's only 2 or 3 choices of names in this world....maybe so, cases would just be A v B, B v C, C v D....den no matter how i memorize, the case would never be that far apart...
i received a message from Agogo yesterday which goes something like this:
P/S: sorry for being moody....and i'm sorry if i'm not myself nowadays....
stress + tired =Moody Quinn
next week a.k.a tomorrow will be the official beginning of exam week....thus i send like a million good luck text to my friends and the normal reaction one would get is to say thanks and wish u good luck as well....well, that's what i got but the only thing is that, i am like already halfway through my exam and only like 5 people wished me before tonight...even though i've posted it on my msn, facebook and my blog...how saddening for no one to notice me at all....
anyways, it's the thought that counts and thanks guys for wishing me...before the exam or halfway through the exam....
P/S:i still love my friends....
have been writing in lots of walls (facebook) and my personal messages as some of you might have notice....kinda felt sick of guys....without them, lots of things won't happen....
love wouldn't have happened...
most of all, nothing that they do would hurt any one else...sometimes, guys can be so silly and not to forget, stupid....buy yet, sometimes they can be sweet and nice and they can give us warm fussy feeling.....
maybe u should stop lying...
maybe you should just know that what you're doing is wrong...
maybe you should know that i'm talking and pin pointing at you....
sometimes, girls just cry because of silly stuffs...
- how could you cry because he doesn't trust you?
- how could you cry if that's the way he thinks about you?
- why would you even bother or why would you even try to impress him?
guys that makes you cry just aren't worth it....
girls are just silly....but they just can't control it...
QoTD: those that makes you cry just aren't worth it, the one that are worth it wouldn't want you to cry....
P/S:this is a totally random post.....
am i lazy or what?just realise that i'm the only one who keeps blogging even though i'm in the midst of exam season....damn, i'm lazy and i know i'm just giving myself a chance to procastinate....it's actually all your fault....yes u....u know that right....because you guys keep coming back to read my blog and to care for me,you're actually the reason i'm blogging....hahaha!!!anyways, i do feel glad for that you guys do keep up with my blog....without you guys, i would just be talking to myself..... *smiles* and not be able to rant to anyone else...
p/s: but on a serious note, my blog is amazing, ain't it?i even got spammers.... Hahaha!!!
everyone looks so tired during exam season and i've never seen so many students in one place like this except and only during exam season....everywhere like common room and the library is seriously packed....you need to be there either way early or way late to have a place....well,at least the students here do study huh......some people even sleep and eat here!!!
stress level is increasing...
anyways, gotta go back to studying now....need to pick up my slack....sleepy sleepy me...
need to cram all these stupid cases into my small brain....
P/S:still missing ur hugs and kisses....
just done with one paper and yet, there's still 3 more left.... feeling so stressed out and yet, not really doing anything....it kinda feels like since you know that you're gonna fail, might as well just give up on all of it right?feels like there's too many thinigs happening and life is passing you by too fast and you can't stop it.....gonna unleash all my different colours later on...
anyways, what needs to be done needs to be done right?i really should stop procastinating....maybe someone should wake me up and show me how important all of these are....i really don't wanna stay back for another year....it's gonna be even more stress and the embarrasement...not only to me and my friends but most of all...to my parents....
besides that,i haven't even finish my university application and 4 more of my assignments are not even handed in yet....arghhhh!!!!i gotta pick up now....see how lazy i am...i know that i need to finish up so much things and yet i'm not doing it...
currently trying to finish up my personal statement and yet, reading equity & trusts on the other hand....i'm so multi-tasking....haha!!!!
p/s: can't regret what have had happen....all i can do is try harder and work harder...
April 8 (Wednesday)
April 10 (Friday)
Equity and Trusts
-totally not prepared
April 16 (Thursday)
Law of Torts
April 17 (Friday)
How am i gonna make it through.... *sobs* should've studied harder *kicks herself in her head*
too dumb to ever learn my lesson and guess what?mid sessionals is 20 % ...i'm screwed...dumb ass me...
just saw a friend and he guessed that i'm a BIT student because he said i'm lazy...OMG....it's that obvious that i'm a procastinator.....i seriously need to step up....
got this off of Tania's blog
1. Drink plenty of water
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy
5. Make time for prayer
6. Play more games
7. Read more books than you did in 2008
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day
9. Sleep for 7 hours
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day ---- and while you walk, smile
11. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do ; keep your limits
14. Don't take yourself so seriously ; no one else does
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
16. Dream more while you are awake
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
25. Call your family often
26. Each day give something good to others
27. Forgive everyone for everything
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day
30. What other people think of you is none of your business
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.
32. Do the right things
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
34. GOD heals everything
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
37. The best is yet to come
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.
Last but not the least :
40. Do forward this to everyone you care about.
All I hear is raindrops
Falling on the rooftop
Oh baby tell me why’d you have to go
Cause this pain I feel
It wont go away
And today I’m officially missing you
I thought that from this heartache
I could escape
But I fronted long enough to know
There ain’t no way
I’m officially missing you
can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do
Hey baby said it stays on my mind
And I, and I, I’m officially
All I do is lay around
Two ears full tears
From looking at your face on the wall ( face on the wall)
Just a week ago you were my baby
Now I don’t even know you at all
i don’t know you at all
Well I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess its safe to say babe safe to say that
I'm, I'm officially missing you
(Ohhhh) can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do
Hey baby said it stays on my mind
And I, and I, I’m officially
Well I thought I could just get over you baby
But I see that’s something I just can’t do
From the way you would hold me
To the sweet things you told me
I just can’t find a way
To let go of you
You know that I’m missing youoohhh
All I hear is raindrops
And I’m officially missing
he called and i wanted so much to tell him how i felt....but all i did was just kept quiet....i don't know what to say or do....it's healing but it felt like the wound opened up again....what am i suppose to do?what exactly is it that you want me to do?if you want to let it go and you want me to let it go, the least you could do is help me....when i text you, you don't text back..there's only so much a girl can do......
i saw a really funny note on facebook today....click this link
...but it really does makes lots of sense....especially since now i'm so totally hooked on facebook...i need to go to rehab.....maybe lay low of facebook for a little while...only if i can.....
gonna go celebrate CH's birthday later...it's a surprise but i doubt she'll read my blog anytime soon....anyways,her birthday's on Sunday and we're just celebrating in advance....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL...
i found a quote from my friend and it sounded so meaningful...
We all want to fall in love. Why? Bcos dat experience makes us feel completely alive. It may only last a moment, an hour, or an afternoon,but dat doesn't diminish its value,bcos we r left wit memories dat we treasure 4 d rest of our lives.
that's why i said to admit love rather than to deny it....
feelings are like breeze...they come and go...
but sometimes they stay on a little longer than they're suppose to....it'll be fine if it's a soft, soothing breeze ut sometimes it'll grow stronger and eventually it'll turn into a storm...and yet sometimes, there will be a storm which could somehowstill be soothing and yet strong enough to sweep you off your feet... the horrible storm is slowly passing me by...thanks to dd for showing me so much care...but i still doubt his feelings for me because he doesn't really show me how he feels....but i'm still thankful for him though....
thanks for everything....
P/S:HAPPY APRIL FOOL,GUYS!!!
may all ur pranks not get u guys into trouble....don't believe what anyone tell u on this fateful day...